I pretended so hard to be a proper wife
From my book, Severe Silence (http://amzn.to/2u0ZDbx)
I pretended so hard to be a proper wife,
but a passionate, free-spirited woman inside
kept screaming to be expressed.
Finally the moment came
when my body could no longer contain both women.
It began with a series of mysterious ailments
over the course of several months
and culminated in a severe attack of shingles
right in the middle of my back,
the only place I couldn't reach to scratch.
I stood in the doorway
rubbing my itching back against the doorframe,
crying in pain and frustration,
understanding exactly where these escalating illness were leading.
This inner conflict could actually kill me.
I could no longer keep putting off the inevitable.
I had to leave.
Not brave enough to confront him directly, I planned my escape,
when I would leave, where I would go.
I waited for a day he wouldn't be home,
packed some clothes, washed the dishes,
took out the garbage, tidied up,
and snuck out, like a fugitive.